Lariss tames a pet, Part 4


Hi Internetz,
Thanks for coming back. I was just tellin the story of me and Trek. If you missed it, you can catch it from the beginning.
When I last talked (you just read it, I did all the work. Thanks for nothing) we just met Fluffy Wuffi... err Trek outside of the Night Elf port town. Now that we had a super pet in a fashionable black, it was time to carry on with the rest of our adventure.
What I really wanted to know was...Where do those boats go. From my vantage point near the road, I could see a great long dock, with all kinds of ship activity. This curious hunter needed to know where those boats were going. So Trek and I made a plan.
Realistically, I did all the thinking. Trek just rolled around on the ground. It turns out she loves tummy rubs. Its soooo soft under there, so I don't mind. It just didn't seem as ferocious as I'd expected. But we had a spirit bond, I knew what she was capable of. (Frankly its a little scary). And what goes on with a hunter and her pet is none of your business, unless you happen to be staring down the barrel of my gun with my cat chewing on your ass. Then you better make it your business. Got it? good, I thought you might.
The plan was for Trek to chase 2 of the Night Elf guards, and distract them while I snuck up onto the dock, and ran onto one of the crates to be loaded onto the ship. I had to explain it to her 3 times, because she is a cat and she isn't used to planning anything. But once we were on the same page, Trek executed it perfectly.
She prowled up behind one of the unsuspecting guards. It was a woman. Almost all of the Night Elf guards were Purple women. (Their asses are huge btw). Trek leaped onto her and raked her claws across her back. The weight of the pounce and the unexpected attack threw the Purple Elf guard to the ground. I'm sure Trek would have been able to bite through her neck, but she knew that she was needed elsewhere. The other guards rushed to their comrades aid, and soon there were 5 or 6 of these guards chasing my companion. They were no match for her speed. As they chased her through the village, I ran up onto the dock, and headed towards the biggest ship. It had just been loaded with the last bit of cargo and was about to set sail. I whistled the signal and Trek sped up the dock towards me, with her purple pursuers in tow. I'd owe her a good long belly rub once this was all over.
She made it onto the boat as we were puling away. Luckily it was a merchant crew and they weren't about to pick a fight with me and my giant cat who had managed to evade a dozen of the town guards. They weren't particularly happy to have us aboard though, and we got many dirty looks. the trip took a long time. Like, forever. Trek was vigilant, making sure no harm came to either of us during the trip. One of the crew, (the biggest. he was blue, and had horns and hooves. looked like a cross between a goat and some great blue elf) stared at me a lot during the trip. I think he was checking me out. Pervy blue hoofy horny guy. Trek's hackles would raise whenever he came close to our corner of the deck.
My stomach sank when I saw where we were headed. A great port, the walls of the fortified city gleamed white in the sunshine. I think some of the crew sensed my unease because they started talking amongst themselves, laughing while they looked at me. It might also be because I had gotten sea sick 3 times during the night and was not looking my normal fabulous self. Whatever.
The ship pulled into port. We were met by two armed guards. Their Plate armour, gleaming and polished, looked quite daunting. Except for the stupid little things in the top of their helmets, those just looked silly. We stepped on the dock,and they promptly ran us both through, and that's all I remember of the city.
One of the great things about being me is that I have a very different sense of mortality than you do. I don't really "die" like you do. Ha ha.
I came to in a graveyard. The great walls of the city were visible in the distance, but there were no guards near. I whistled for Trek, but she didn't appear. I began the incantation to bring her back from the spirit world. Its a draining spell, but I'm skilled enough that I can recover from it quickly. The strength of the bond between Trek and me helps to recover even quicker. Once we were nourished and rested up, we resumed our journey. I headed away from the great walled city.
It was a long frickin walk.
We walked through boring orchard and farm land. We reached the mountains, and headed south, away from the red rocks and creepy red spiders. Ugg, I hate tarantulas. We headed into spooky dark woods. There were Howls in the distance and I got a sense that even the bushes and trees were watching us. It felt like we were being stalked by something just out of sight. Trek was very uneasy, which didn't help. We ran at the sound of voices. There were guards patrolling the roads, and they would give chase at the sight of us. We didn't get caught, but we were chased up a hill onto the ledge of a great ravine. I began to look for an escape route, but our pursuer (looked like a short fat High Elf who had had most of his ears chewed off) turned around and ran away twice as fast as the speed at which he gave chase when he recognized where were.
I didn't like the ravine. It was cold, and dirty. It was getting late and we were running out of daylight. Dark, with dead trees and traces of old campfires here and there. The screeches of carrion birds in the not too far distance were motivation enough for us to keep travelling. We passed by a few large stones, it looked as though they had drawings of huge fat Elves with horns on their heads. I've since been told by an Orc friend, that these were ogres. We didn't see any Ogres on our trek, but I did catch glimpse of a huge black bird circling nearby. We turned tail before it could reach us, I'm sure it would have made lunch out of both Trek and me if there had been more light for it to see us by.
As we descended out of the hills, the landscape turned greener. It became warmer, humid, and the ground had turned very swampy. We came across an Orc patrol. She directed us to her camp, a place she called Stonard. It seemed like a long trip from the dark ravine to Stonard, and the campfires were a welcome sight. We found the local inn and slept for the night.
When I woke in the morning, Trek was sitting at the foot of my bed. Her growling told me she was not happy. My bags were opened, its contents strewn about the room. The chewed leather sheath of my claymore told me that Trek was hungry. Ugg. No Kitty thats a BAD Kitty!
We purchased food from the innkeeper, and headed out to see Stonard in the day. I liked it more by night. It made Orgrimmar look beautiful by comparison. If Orgrimmar is a hole, Stonard is a pit toilet. What is with those Orcs? don't they know what a real city looks like? Haven't they been to Silvermoon? It was still better than Undercity mind you. I found the flightmaster. My next destination was a town called Ironforge. The conversation went something like this.
Me: "I would like to purchase a flight to Ironforge".
Orc Flightmaster: Blank stare. /pick nose.
Me: "DWARF CITY!"
Orc Flightmaster: kek
Me: " Expletive, Expletive, bleepity bleep Expletive. IRONFORGE"
Orc Flightmaster: quizzical look. (easy to recognize by now). "You can't get there from here.
Me: /sigh. "Why the F**K not?"
Orc Flightmaster: "You don't know any flight paths connected to this one".
Me: /flips bird and hearths back to Orgrimmar.

No comments:

Post a Comment